Friday, 30 March 2012

Looking forward

Some people have asked me if I’m worried that I’ll miss my paintings or one day regret not being able to show them again as part of another exhibition.

It's true that my paintings mean a great deal to me.  As with all belongings, they have stored memories and sentiments of where I was in my life when I painted them and what my values were at the time.  Part of the fear of letting go of possessions is that they are somehow part of our identity; that it’s our things that make us who we are and define us to some extent.

I think we are encouraged to believe this but my experience is that we are constantly changing and by holding on to old stuff we are tempted to stay stuck in old ways of being too.  I feel my creative side can take flight as my paintings move on to pastures new!

I’ve been thinking about how other professions let go of work and in fact where they consider their work to exist.  For example, when retiring, does a teacher consider her work to exist within the many boxes or files of lesson plans or is it a living thing that exists within all her ex-students?

Does my work exist in the paintings I make or in the experience of the people who look at them?  If it’s the latter, how sad for them to be stored away, inert.  People who own my paintings say they often see something new and respond differently to them as time goes on.  I think in this way, they do have a life of sorts.

All of these feelings put together, tell me that I don’t need to hold on to my paintings and enables me to let go of how much they go for and where they go to.  The whole thing is about movement and energy and freedom to grow.

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